Insecure? It may be your fault...
I’ve said all of those things to myself at some point. To be honest, I’ve said some of those things to myself TODAY. Everyone has insecurities, but with everything going on right now, mine have taken over all of my free brain cells. I started to feel bad for myself, but then I said this “Either level up or get left behind”. It may sound harsh, but it’s true. I had to realize that many (not all) of the things I am insecure about are in fact, my fault. I’ll go ahead and use myself as an example.
Before COVID, I was snatched. I was in the best shape of my life. Now, I feel sluggish, and I’m pretty sure I’ve gained a couple pounds. I find myself often envying women that have the body type I used to have. What you don’t know is a good friend of mine lent me her dumbbells and a kettle bell to use and they have been sitting in the same spot for 3 weeks. So guess who’s fault it is that I don’t look the same? Me.
I’ve never been super stylish, and most of the time I envy those that have the confidence to pull off outfits that I wish I could. I’m also cheap. I’ll wear something until the wheels fall off, do my own hair instead of going to the salon, and i’m too impatient to invest in makeup and learn to really apply it. So guess who’s fault it is that I don’t look the way I want? Me.
“I wish I could carry on a conversation like them.” This is the one I say to myself all the time. All. the. time. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been with a group of people and I felt like I had nothing to contribute to the conversation. I was embarrassed, and I just felt plain old dumb. But guess why everyone else had something to say and I didn’t? They researched, they read, they study. I’ll admit, especially lately, after I’m done with work for the day, I don’t want to do anything. But guess what? You’ve got to put in the work if you want results. Sometimes it requires late nights, it requires you being a little tired. You don’t become an expert on something by osmosis. So again, guess who’s fault it is? Me.
Look, even as I’m writing this, it’s hard for me to accept. It’s hard to accept that I’m the problem sometimes.
I’m not saying that everything you are insecure about is all on you, but I am saying it may be time to take a look at the man or woman in the mirror. Billy Preston sang “Nothing from Nothing leaves Nothing.” You can’t withdraw from an empty cup. So get up and get to work on the things you can control. You got this.
Love always,
CDOG